My Story

I just heard someone say the other day, "Everyone has a story!" Here is mine. I became sick with ulcerative colitis (UC) when I was 18 years old. I started nursing school in Fall of 1980. The stress of nursing school does not help UC. In the early Spring of 1982, I was having 7-8 bowel movements a day, that were close to being pure blood. I remember one time making a mess in my pants at the hospital, and had to go home. (That was before the ostomy!) By Fall of 1982, I was sickly thin, and had to have blood transfusions for blood loss from the UC. In November of 1982, my UC turned into toxic megacolon, a life threatening condition. My ileostomy surgery was an emergency type. I didn't have alot of time to prepare ahead of time. I was so sick, that they only made my ileostomy, and had to wait until later to take out the rest of my large bowel. I was in ICU for a week after the first surgery which was 2 days before Thanksgiving, I had a pinhole gastric (stomach) ulcer that perforated. That started another 3 or 4 months of almost continuous hospitalizations. I had numerous pockets of infection in my abdominal cavity. In the midst of all of that, I developed a swollen lymph node on the left side of my neck that turned out to be Hodgkin's disease. They took my spleen out to "stage" my Hodgkin's. I had radiation therapy on my neck for about 6 weeks. After finally getting back to nursing school, and what I was re-learning to believe was a "normal" life (with an ileostomy), the Hodgkin's disease recurred in my lungs. I then had yet another operation on my left lung, and put off nursing school for another 6 months. I started a year long trek of chemotherapy; the second 6 months facing the fact that I may lose all of my hair, temporarily, at age 22. The thought of that was worse than my ileostomy. I made it through the chemo, didn't lose my hair enough to wear the wig I had bought, and now I am a Registered Nurse. When I say to my patients, "been-there, done-that", I do honestly mean it. Since I recovered from that physical trauma in my life, I got married. The man I married had no idea how emotionally sick that I was from that physical trauma in my life, and neither did I. The marriage lasted 14 years. I think I was just too afraid to try it on my own before that, and ended up drinking to escape all the "stuff" in my life that made me unhappy. I ended up becoming a member of a 12 step program, and getting a divorce. I have since met a man who gives me that emotional support that I so desparately needed in that marriage. He doesn't let me get away with the "games" I got so used to playing. Thus, those games were games that sick people played. I am on my way to emotional recovery. God is responsible for all of it. Believing God is not always easy, but Faith is resting in God's love, His presence, and His provision. Peace, Faith, and Love to all, Jacy